Kortos - Blog

WARNING!

One day, soon, all the dogs will eat all the cats in the world. This will bring about an epidemic of rats and mice, as well as other such rodents which cats tend to kill for fun. The furry things will procreate to an extreme level, which will probably lead to a new evolution that protects them from poisons and traps, probably makes them develop wings or something.

But that's not the worst part.

The owls and other bird-type hunters will have such an overwhelming amount of food running about that it will warp their minds and make them susceptible to hunting bigger prey. Soon after, birds will be trying to eat gazelles and zebras, and the crocodiles will have nothing to eat so they will eat themselves and perish as well. The gazelles will have nowhere to run, with everything trying to eat them, and eventually they will form a fragile alliance with the humans -who, by this point, are struggling for control- in which the humans will use them to carry stuff around and look cute in museums and petting zoos, in exchange for protection. Once the birds realize this, they will turn their warbeaks against the humans -and thus begins the first interracial war- and begin systematically taking them down.

First Washington will fall.

Then New York.

Then London.

Then Pretoria -but that's in Africa, so no one will really care about that one.

And soon, the humans begin hiding in caves and underwater, unable to defend themselves against the onslaught of the birds (like in the cool movie!). The gazelles will find their protection to be frigid at best, once the humans become the primary source of food for the larger birds. The tropical forests and the other wildlife habitats will fall under a strict martial rule of the Avians -they will change their names to that.

The rodents who developed wings will take flight then, and join the Avians in the sky. But the Avians will find their territory threatened and start a fight. But the rodents are too many -there's just no way to stop a mutated rat with wings! So the fight lasts only for a short while, until the birds decide it's in their best interests to unite and form an alliance with the rodents.

The thing will last for several years, until a few rodents decide they don't want to keep living with feathery friends. The will publicly declare in a press conference, that "whichever rodents wish to return to their lifestyles of old, could unite in the ceremonial conference room at the end of August, where the AviRode Treaty (the famous alliance between Avians and Rodents) would be officially out of jurisdiction. Those who hate Avians, are welcome too."

However, the birds, astute as ever, will decide to massacre those gathered rodents, and cover it all up with a clever ruse. Some rodents will eventually catch up with the truth of the incident and begin to form an underground resistance called 'WHAT' (We.Hate.Avians.Too.) -these rodents weren't the brightest of the bunch.

After years of struggling, and guerrilla warfare, they will manage a shocking victory against the Avians and force them back into the trees (by this, I mean a whole other continent). And the rats will rule over the western world...until the humans realize what happened, and bring out their guns and eradicate the rats. They then find no other source of nourishment, so they eat the gazelles.